What a rollercoaster ……

What a day. Honestly I would never imagine that day of almost not doing anything can be so mentaly hard on me.
For no reason today I went through almost all emotions.

Sadness, Anger, confussion, hapiness, energy spike and super low levels of energy. Today I expirianced it.

Very weird….. I haven’t felt like this in very long time. This quarantine – now day 22. is not working out for me. Not at all.

On a regular day, If I was allowed out i would manage all of those feeling in a hart beat. I would meditate, go to the gym, take a ride on my motorcycle… you name it. I have my ways of controling my emotions.

But beeing locked in this room, without most of my “tools” to control my emotions – let’s say this way – it puts me off balance by a lot. and I mean a lot.

On a bright side at least now I know how to identify my emotions and where they are coming from. It makes controling them much easier.

Today I’ve actually witness how contagious my emotions are. And how some people just soak all emotions projected on them.

Take my girlfriend for example. Today we spoke. on the beginnig her mood was very good. Cheerie and bright in one word – happy. After 15min of talking to meshe looked more depressed than me and we did ended up arguing.
I do now it was my emotions which she just soaked like a sponge which caused all this. It is a plus that I realize this now. What annoyed me was that she was not able to understand how difficult is to control myself while beeing locked in here.

But how can she understand. She doesn’t have 20 crazy monkies in here head like I do………..

20 crazy monkies are subject for another time…………

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